antiquated models

March 14th, 2008

            I really want to put the word ‘rant’ to rest, for my part.  I think I’ll stop using it and it’s rather self-deprecating for me to describe a tangential diatribe as a rant, or rather an exploratory soliloquy (A poem is, after all, a walk).   My thought process works as a network of tangents that are tributaries from certain engrained essences.  These ‘essences’ are truths that I believe at the core of my being, truths that emanate from some abstract sense of ‘good’.  (Tangent #1: mystical/post-modern Biblical interpretation)  Some people look to the Ten Commandments for a blueprint of their morality.  Those particular laws can be discovered without a biblical decree even.  Many people, just through the course of living, realize that they should not kill or steal, etc.  My thoughts about that are that one must also be a mystic to consider the implications of ‘thou shall not worship false idols’.  What does that mean?  Well, I believe that one must align themselves toward the universal essences and not superficial appearances.  Should the bible be taken as literal truth? (A question asked during a recent republican debate.)  Well, I would argue that a literal interpretation would be the act of worshipping a false idol.  Regardless of its holiness, it’s a book!  People argue over what it means, people interpret its passages poorly.  There is no divine objectivity involved in our interaction with this.   How does it pertain to my life and how does it benefit this community? 

            So, I’ve been collecting arguments and sound bites in my head recently, gathering mostly impressions and interpretations that have been pointing toward what I believe to be a big issue facing us as Americans.  We, every one of us, need to contemplate ‘change’ in this same mystical sense.  I ranted earlier about how change has t-boned the music industry and how its collapse is a direct result of its shortsightedness.  We are seeing health care failure here in

America which is causing many of us to think hard about a lot of issues.  What value is our health, politically?  Class issues:  The rich receive better health care than the poor, it’s an institution in this country and it defines our views on healthcare.  I’m not a scholar on health care but allegedly we are suffering from a crisis on healthcare.  People who get paid to think about these things really need to step ‘outside of the box’ and embracing a certain artistic approach to solving these problems.  Ever hear someone say “I can’t draw, I have no talent”… Well, regarding healthcare, they better start exercising those hidden creative talents, the ones that can conjure up solutions.  Allegedly, that’s where the abstract

church of

Barak Obama
comes into play.   People in this country are realizing collectively that creativity is needed for the bigger picture to correct itself and we sure as hell ain’t gonna get it from these “old farts in office” as my father likes to refer to them as.  

    The music industry is plagued with these ‘old farts’ and their old antiquated models.  Healthcare is bogged down in chaos and injustice. What else?  Hmm.. Well, the other day I saw this interview with this major big wig billionaire (who’s name I can’t recall on command) and he said that “American business is losing its edge in the world market”.  What he went on to describe perked my interest because it was thematically identical to what I am ‘ranting’ about right this very second.  Corporate business being bogged down in ineffectual bureaucracy, waste, and mismanagement.  CEOS being rewarded for huge quarterly losses with astronomical bonuses, an old tired system that just means pain for those of us at the bottom who are just trying to maintain and find some glimmering of happiness in our lives.  Some of us work for these huge conglomerates and guess what??? DON’T HAVE HEALTHCARE.   Yeah, I know that corporations put bacon on the table for masses of people (that would otherwise be savages running amok) and I’m comfortable to admit that such a detail does not go unnoticed and even goes into the plus category.  Corporations are about big money and if they have to go to

India to save/make big money, or if they have to systematically degrade the cultures of the world and the health and character of the people with uninspired mediocrity, they most certainly will.  Apparently, what I was hearing in this interview with the billionaire guy was that even big big business needs to seriously embrace a creative and new model of thinking or face extinction or maybe even worse: 2nd place.   

    Lastly, it seems that

America and what they call the

Western Hemisphere needs to evaluate our distinction of good and evil.  Something just to ponder as we go about our business.   The east has commonly integrated these things, philosophically (see the yin-yang symbol, the duality of the black and white sperm looking things within the unity of the sphere.)    I think within the recent decade this has come to an alarming head and should be something worthy of serious re-evaluation.  We have a president and commander and chief that is pointing the finger at other nations calling them ‘evil.’   The Governor of New York, a renowned do-gooder, falling into a scandal involving prostitutes.   The scandals of pedophilia in the Catholic Church.  Absolute power corrupting absolutely and all those irresistible temptations.  If you ever read the news, it seems as though our culture is becoming more violent, more detached, more lost, as they days continue.   Those yin/yang sperm swimming around amok in everyone’s heads, running into walls drunk.  I’m just thinking about balance.  It’s 2008 we have allegedly put people on the moon.  It’s weird to think about all the things we can’t do and all the crucial things we just can’t organize in our civilization. It’s weird that we don’t prioritize quality of living in our values (for ourselves and others).  I’m sorry, I’ve been realizing lately that there’s an anxiety that I’m suffering from.  There’s an oil crisis going on (why haven’t we prepared for this?), a housing crisis (I’d in the A!), healthcare crisis (asleep at the wheel), and sorry, an education crisis (is there some economic model somewhere that says we actually benefit from keeping our people stupid?)      When I write this stuff, I think to myself that it’s pretty sophomoric.  It doesn’t follow grammar all that well, these thoughts have been expressed by folks far more articulate in their delivery and sophisticated in their thinking already well before hand.   I think to myself, yes, writing for catharsis, for therapy.   But you know, I talk to some people around me to try some basic ideas out and see how they fit together in some possibly futile effort to find a unified field theory that draws it all together and I discover that some times people are dumfounded by these ideas.  Like, we really do all live in our own little bubbles and some bubbles are way different than mine and they have other priorities to obsess over.  So, it’s never great to assume as the saying goes, and it’s pretty narcissistic to think everyone thinks like the voice one hears inside one’s head.   Anyhow, thus concludes today’s passionate idealistic voyage.  I do believe that these periodic cathartic passages will yield ultimately to a more focused, intelligent, and poignant critique of what’s going on out there.  In the last several years of the Bush paradigm, we have been accustomed to not hearing more of the criticisms of the creative class, the voices that have naively stumbled upon interesting perspectives of tired issues.   The whole ’shut up and play’ thing just doesn’t have a place in modern democracy.  If you’re paying taxes, you’re an artist, a political satirist, an organizer, a voice.  If you’re me, you need a nap. And how! 

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Cult Pilgrimage 2.0

February 29th, 2008

            I must admit that I am fascinated with the discussions going on about the future of music.  thebrotheregg just released our recent 7 song ep on a short run of cds and 12” vinyl on our own label and I have been trying for ages to figure out where we stand in the large glut of noise out there.  I’ve always loved the cult phenomena of music, that I can embrace something and make it my own and often the really significant things happening are way off radar.  More seismic bands don’t possess this self-discovery potential by this theory, the point either way, is for one to find one’s own self reflected in the values of music.  Anyhow, I’ve modeled my life after this cult thing.  I’ve known others who have, too.  But this idea was largely a part of my younger years when identities and allegiances were just forming and I was writing with pen on my jeans and Chucks the perfectly recreated moniker of the Misfits or the Subhumans (UK).  Anyhow, with the internet and all this availability of every factoid under the sun, those untarnished discoveries maybe don’t mean as much?  I don’t have to make a long pilgrimage to find obscure records any more, so I guess the phenomenon has changed a bit.  Likewise, with everyone listening to whatever, kids might not be growing up with this top 40 group think like they once did which has really unified previous generations.  Hell, ask anyone my age about Duran Duran or Thriller and they’ll probably have memories and feelings that are shared with everyone of that age.  Does that exist anymore?  Someone recently was talking about ‘Brass Monkey’ and instantly everyone in the room had the same though about the Beastie Boys because the Beastie Boys taught every seventh grader in

America
what it was, but they didn’t necessarily make it sound all that appealing.  So, if everyone has an ipod and the internet and are pursuing their own identities through the listening to and identification with music, then the whole shared generational experience has likely gone to hell.  Is this true?  Well, things are certainly different so let’s just leave it at that.    The pursuit of music is an act of giving, or rather a personal investment that makes one an active participant.  This is an obvious truth at a live concert because the audience gives and takes, but the gives part is not as acknowledged.  The musicians on stage take as well, which again, is not really acknowledged as this process is alchemical in nature.             Well, this cult music idea is necessary and I’ve talked to certain people along the road that I felt embodied this idea or at least were outwardly sympathetic to it.  One person actually told me that they didn’t even like a band anymore once people started catching on to it (that was in the early 90’s when I remember hearing and remembering that).  Public acknowledgement perhaps took away the uniqueness of the unknown band and somehow popularity made the experience diluted, I don’t know.  I just found it an interesting point of view, but now one can go on-line and find communities of people who have made the very same isolated discoveries all over the world and so one can readily lose the martyrdom of their unique discovery.  That’s the embodiment of my cult musings.  It’s not necessarily about the music itself but a person’s connection to it.   It’s about the involvement of the listener and different aspects of what one has to gain from the experience of listening.   For me and my evolving production knowledge, music often is ones and zeros and if I like something or hate it, it possesses all these characteristics that I observe as I observe additionally my reaction to them.   I am personally now somewhere in between that adolescent porous brain with the marked up jeans and the old, unmoving ornery curmudgeon who relies entirely on opinions that have formulated in previous ages.         With our own label producing another fine thebrotheregg recording, a lot of questions came to me, and a whole new preoccupation about the state of things was born.  When thebrotheregg released its first platter in 1993, the independent arena was wide open for us and we were able to get critical analysis from the top magazines in the industry, etc who generally liked the album but did not wet their pants over it.  Sebadoh was big and the Shrimper label was putting out all sorts of cassette releases and so was Daniel Johnson so our

Drag

City
obsession fell right in.  Things have changed considerably and it seems that anyone with a laptop and a guitar is putting out their own music and that’s what K Records and Pump up the Volume seemed to want in terms of revolutionary decentralization.  So what was once sort of a hip trend called ‘lo-fi’ is now just the way of things and the sound of people making do with they have on a global scale, and this brings me to an eventual point.  Someone has coined the term to describe the new abyss of creative potential and marketing possibilities: Music 2.0            Actually this article that I stumbled upon by Nate Anderson was entitled “Music exec: “Music 1.0 is dead.”   and that’s where I referenced Music 2.0 from because it’s not my idea.  So all sorts of music industry people gathered together to discuss the future models of music sales and distribution as they are watching their old command of the market fail and they have made this distinction between 1.0 and 2.0.  Sounds fine, I can relate to the idea and all and this falls in line with my latest academic obsession:  The future of music.  Well, since I devoted myself to pursuing this cult music label (Dandelion Wine) and produce music on vinyl in short run, I wondered where does our cult presence fit into this equation?   So, it started off this way but you know, there’s really all sorts of intelligent interesting writing going on about the subject and some of it really is speculative science, some of it daydreaming, some of it analysis of all this new creative marketing, etc.  I’m fascinated by it but kind of, as they say, like loitering around a car accident scene.  I still haven’t personally caught on to the whole ipod thing because when I’m out and about these days, I really want to enjoy the ambient sounds of the world and take a break from all the mixing and tracking and just plain old trippin’ out to the home hi-fi.  People rant about the poor quality of mp3s and all that, but I used to listen to top 40 out of a radio clock and used to hold up a tape recorder to it to record the current hits!  Remember ‘Rock It’ by Herbie Handcock?  ‘Here Comes the Rain Again’?  They both went through that process, and the record companies received nothing from me, except for maybe K-Mart whom produced the crappy blank tapes that these songs went on.               Anyhow, I’ve been saying for ages that who gives an F about the music industry.  Certainly thebrotheregg doesn’t benefit from it in any way.  I’ve generally taken the position of advocating its complete collapse, or at least its decentralization as I mentioned before.   I think the industry did its best to kill itself, frankly, so I don’t feel so bad and welcome any new models that favor and respect the fans whom empower this universe.  CD prices have been so ridiculous over the last decade that I have certainly turned myself off to it, favoring used items or just downright devious duplications.   They expected people to pay $18.99 at Sam Goody for the latest Linkin Park Cd or whatever the hell.  No wonder music fans have opted for free sharing.   And you know, when the prices are like that, it’s not only cost prohibitive, but it turns people real conservative about the music they purchase.  They just can’t budget for the whole freedom to take risks as a consumer and go out-on-a-limb with any music that merely looks interesting or that they’ve heard was cool from someone or some magazine becomes is not fiscally an option.  Back when I was younger and had some disposable income, I would buy a record just because it was released on SST records or because the lead singer also appeared on some other record I liked.   This sometimes resulted in me discovering the GREATEST THING EVER.  I found the Bevis Frond this way which is one of my favorite bands to this day.  Because Nick Saloman (front man to the Frond) appeared on a Nurse with Wound record once, I figured “This must be strange, a rocker guitar player whom appeared on a far out industrial, surrealistic, occult, noise project.  MUST be interesting.”   I always thought these items should be more affordable so that people had maybe a bit of extra cash and could then get a bit crazy, maybe try out that thebrotheregg cd they’ve been eyeing.   Shot themselves in the arse, they did.  And then they went on TV and everywhere and tried to get our sympathies because they’ve been boarded by pirates who have degraded them and commandeered their vessel.  And they have the RIAA thing which show what hostile bastards they really are when they feel as though they’re being threatened.  They say that file sharing is “stealing from the artist” and since I heard that mentioned at the Grammy’s some years ago, I thought it was funny because wasn’t it always the major label’s job to steal from the artist?  It’s like opposing factions in the Godfather.    Really, I don’t care much because I’m not involved in that business but it’s interesting being a speculative philosopher with a Taoist detachment, let it wash over you and then go back to what’s really important.  Perhaps it’s know thine enemy or something, like studying about the Holocaust or something.  Yes, naturally I’d rather be reading the Amber Spyglass, but I must know about models of propaganda so, as my 7th grade history teacher so ignorantly said, “you don’t make the same mistakes of the past.”  I think I mentioned that in a previous entry.  Yeah, right!     Anyhow, it’s a beautiful day outside and the whole world doesn’t have to be going to poop if I don’t want it to.  I’m going outside and then later maybe play a little guitar and drink some fine Deschutes Ale, maybe see what’s what on a realistic level.  I must tell you about the tambura that I just bought, but that’ll have to be later.  It’s an Indian drone instrument to accompanying vocal ragas.  Hopefully from here forward I can spend more quality time posing a spirited inquiry into the Essence.  Won’t you please join me?       

the Vinyl Party

February 13th, 2008

There was a commercial airing recently that I witnessed on TV, at a bar, with the sound off, and no closed-captioning.  Without the sound I’m not 100% sure, but the gist of it was that a fellow, maybe in his late twenties or early thirties was going to have his girl friend move into his apartment, but when she stepped foot in there, his pad was packed wall-to-wall with his record collection.  With the sound off, all I could interpret was her obvious displeasure in this, she crossed her arms and shook her head.  No, something was clearly going to have to change.  Well, this noble fellow obviously went out and got a turntable that loaded his record collection right into his computer and there was a brief part of the story showing him loading them one-by-one, the level meters were visible so you could tell what was going on, but the long-and-short of it was that the next time his girlfriend came by, the place was immaculate, no records to be found anywhere.  Where were they?  Stored on his ipod, naturally! 

            Well, I was initially like, what sort of message is this?! Screw these cultural bandits.  The ipod does not replace the turntable and mp3s are not automatically the new preferred music format.  I had questions.   But what is there to question?  Now, I did consider that maybe this fellow didn’t just get rid of his entire collection, but perhaps put it into storage.  That makes sense to me and is a little less sinister.  I can relate to the dilemma, certainly.  Anyone who has had a record collection and has had to move several times can attest to the pain of it all, lugging boxes upon boxes of vinyl from domicile to domicile.   But, I did have a revelation… as someone who hasn’t jumped on the ipod train yet, that perhaps that immaculate apartment depicted in the commercial was indeed a Jetson’s vision of the future, spotless minimalism.   I mean, if you are like me and you still have a wall full of cds, a library of sorts, you can’t help looking at it in wonder, knowing that so many people are carting their entire collection of music around with them in their pocket.  You just can’t help it !   Is the notion of just plain stuff the issue here?  Having stuff vs. not having stuff. 

            I just recently purchased a USB turntable for my computer.  This was a fine investment on my part, I must say.  No regrets, none what-so-ever.  I run it through my pro audio monitors and it sounds golden.  I’m a lot happier too, as a sentient being who has found himself, perhaps again, as a music fan.  As a music fan, I grew up with records and I looked at that gatefold of Michael Jackson with the tiger for eons.  I stared at the intricate adolescent artwork on the Misfits record, “Earth A.D.” for hours and days, etc, etc..  and many other personal stories about self-discovery through music.  So, naturally, it was frustrating when my main source of music retail in

Illinois, “

Record

City” stopped selling records and went entirely CD.  I felt that I had lost and was then forced to get a cd player, against my will.  It wasn’t until just recently that this thought occurred to me, that I was actually railroaded out of the record thing.   Well, now I’m back and I feel happy as pie.   We’ll see.  I’m not advocating luddism and what not although I believe that everyone should incorporate a bit of that into their personality and/or personal politics.  Basically, people should incorporate thinking about technology into their schedules a bit instead of just blindly consuming it.  Just a thought.  People used to really think about this stuff, before and during industrial revolutions, etc.  Some thoughts pointed toward the loss of humanity with the rise of gadgets.  Enslavement, possibly.  With everything happening in a Window’s environment these days, there’s a certain template that most thoughts flow through.    I don’t know, but what I do know is my own life and it’s fun and interesting to write a bit of a rant because you know, we’re talking about quality of living here.  Quality of living for me, regarding music, means giving back.   Like, buying music with money is giving back.  Like, the physical object of a finely crafted 12” record vs. a low-quality mp3 (once again, not ranking on the mp3, but the distinction should be made).  The whole debate about morality and music patronage, the supporting of the arts, the major restructuring of the music industry, to name a few issues, is bringing about a bit of a philosophical nuance to the whole music world.  What I want to say is just that, regarding quality of living, I really feel better giving back, bartering, something for the music, not just taking and taking.  There’s a balance, like the luddite balance, you can be part tech obsessed and part cautious, or maybe superstitious about the potential loss of your soul.  You can be a part giver and a part taker equally.  Like there’s millions of bands and musical projects offering free music, samples, promo stuff… you can’t buy it all !  You don’t need to feel immoral for this modern ‘browsing’ that occurs, you’re learning about new music as you go, you’re being turned on to new ideas.   Feel free to take, take away!  But you know, you can figure how to heal yourself in the process of giving back as well.  Buy cds from bands you see, etc.  I don’t know, I have my own system and let’s not deceive ourselves here.  It’s all about me!  I needs to heal myself and my soul and music does that and I really have to treat it as this sacred practice and how I get it and how I listen to it are equally pertinent to the quality of the content.  It’s like setting yourself up to be an empty vessel to receive and transmit the wisdom of the universe.   But in the end, it’s all about improving your own quality of life.

            This is a typical tirade, I know that quite well.  I wanted to talk about records, vinyl, as if I were starting this new political party or something.   Sending out an awareness of sorts and creating a larger context in which this issue rests.    Naturally, cans of worms and Pandora’s boxes are continually being opened in my head as I write so it’s cool, man.  I wanted to also mention that I was annoyed about my own cynicism regarding all the myspace stuff and all the self-promotion that is running amok from every band and everyone with a guitar who has an album out and wants you to hear it.  It’s a glut of stuff and it’s so unsexy in my mind that bands need to pimp themselves because it defies the glory of being a rock star, that you shouldn’t have to pimp yourself, that the world should just worship and worship some more!  BUT:  I had an epiphany about it all that made me feel really good about everything and took a tremendous burden off my shoulders (because I bear the weight of the world on my shoulders as do many other neurotics).  So, I’ll write another entry about that because I’ve been reading a lot of blogs lately about where music is going because that’s my current thing.  Like, a lot of writers are considering what the future will look like and as far as the transition from what’s going on now with music to what will be going on just five years from now, it will require a certain amount of creativity just to imagine!  Who the hell knows.  But, there are certain things that are positive and some of them hit me like a hammer and I didn’t have the feel cynical any more about the state of things and I could relax and not be Chicken Little for five minutes or so.  Don’t worry, everything will be all right.     

A Matter Involving Some Serious National Security

February 9th, 2008

Right now, I am recovering from a serious flu bug. I think at some point it even morphed into something else entirely which happened to be a really bad cold, but the initial flu stage was quite horrible. If you are living out here in Portland, perhaps you yourself, or someone you know has had this flu thing and can relate to what I’m saying here, I have no doubt of that. I’ve heard testimony from so many that can corroborate on the details and characteristics of this malady. In any case, I’m at least experiencing enough personal physical energy at this point to actually write something, or just do something. This flu thing killed any ability I may have had to do anything and it kept me out of commission for, so far, five and a half days. Unbelievable.
First: the fluctuating body temperature. I think, actually, that my awareness to this flu condition manifested itself in one initial and sudden spasm of cold shivers that was like a writhing irrationally of frigid convulsions, Crucible style. I needed to be held down with a belt shoved in my mouth to prevent myself from gnawing my own lip off with passionate… coldness. Following this, at some point, I woke up drenched in sweat. This back and forth between the two went on for days. Nightmare. At some point it became a terrible cold, like several days later.
Now, there’s a lot of people around going through this and I don’t mean to take time out of everyone’s busy lives to sit here and complain about being sick, poor me. This one just seemed a bit more extreme than anything I have caught while living in the Pacific Northwest. Well, there was that horrible bug in Olympia that sent me to the emergency room to get re-hydrated by IV. That was pretty bad.
No, this one was nasty enough in its own way and it proudly proclaimed itself. It was fascinating to hear about all the other people in every aspect of my life that had just gone through the same thing and had described it in exactly the same way. And the duration that it lasted, down to every little descriptive detail, was the same. Initially, I wanted to blame myself because I perhaps forgot to knock on wood after bragging about how sometimes I enjoy a few good sick days, to you know, really relax. Take care of myself for a change with pampering and justifiable sloth? Some days off where one rents mountains of bad movies or reads an entire book cover to cover. An occasional desire to be sick, if the timing is right and the opportunity for unmolested convalescence exists can sometimes depressurize anything resembling generalized anxiety, or temporarily relax the modern mania. I don’t know what I’m really saying here. Only that a little cold seemed almost romantic to me about a week ago or so, and my initial understanding is that I had posed a challenge somewhere in divinity and that the last week of misery was the reality check for that. On this occasion, I should have properly accented my naive desire for sick apathy with a good knocking on wood. There is nothing cool about being sick. We should be thankful for our good health when we have it.
Aside from feeling that I had somehow jinxed myself into achieving an exaggerated sickness, I also couldn’t help acknowledging the wisdom behind some of the various fevered visions of the past week. This erratic body temperature business I cannot explain scientifically and I did not bother doing much research to see what was actually going on so I will apply my usual impressionism to the experience. It felt crazy, for one. I experienced a kaleidoscope of different thoughts and emotions, which filled out this crazy feeling. I was even able to fit some current events type issues into it, like global warming for example. The economy is another, actually. Both the earth and the economy both have these delicate ecosystems. I wonder if Ecology and Economy are related in that manner. If I would just get off my ass and reach for my Google, I could provide more etymological proof that these words were indeed derived from the same origin. But really, it’s actually more fun right now to voice and preserve the wisdom of complete naïveté, which I earlier briefly mentioned as ‘impressionism’. I guess it would be the opposite of being and ‘expert’ of something. Being an impressionist for the functioning world of today might mean just trusting your impressions of things, maybe going with your gut instincts or acknowledging that all you know about a particular something is the oogy feeling it left you with. In any case, the Economy and the Earth. Be you a fiscal conservative or a ecoenvironmentalist, you can relate to this idea of a delicate network, both of which can be easily disturbed, create a ripple effect, a domino effect, a wildfire effect, a whatever you want to call it effect. Anyhow, our bodies operate on a carefully climate controlled economy of health. I felt as though I had spent too much time cutting down my own Brazilian rainforests at the smoky rock brothels of Portland, or at some hours, walking in the cold rain, I have achieved and surpassed peak oil. Yes, well I must admit the profundity of my sweat lodge experience is severely lacking, but when one becomes intoxicated with fever, these realizations of balance and harmony in the body, and onward to describe the balance of the universe, are wholly felt. The outcome: I must really take better care of myself and additionally, I really must get out there more and live life to it’s fullest. Ha!
The other thing that (must have) set in along the chills and sweats highway was my old friend, paranoia. I don’t really know what to actually call it, at this late hour. Paranoia mixed a bit with anger, or just restlessness at being cooped up inside all week, or just frustrated, whateva. It started to seem at some interval, that the citizens of this fine city, including myself, might have been dusted with an experimental pathogen. I considered calling the Center for Disease Control on the off-chance that no one ever acknowledged the obvious that was staring us all in the face: That all of us who are suddenly and strangely, and similarly with sickness, may be victims of a terrorist biological attack? Maybe now that we’re thinking about global warming, and actually experiencing these catastrophes on earth at this present time, that the delicate ecosystem might be now officially completely out of balance, like if the earth’s temperature were somehow just one degree different or one tiny species of bug dies off and everything get’s thrown out of whack. Maybe suddenly we all start getting sick because the moon is 2 inches closer to us and it manifests in a constant state of nausea that we start to experience. Or maybe that ozone hole is causing our guts to microwave.
But anyhow, by all accounts, many people are reporting a recovery from this flu thing, even me a bit (this still remains a feverish rant is my alibi). My bug was a bit different because it morphed into a cold numerous days later and I actually believe that I got sick twice or rather that I had two different bugs one right after the other. Things were starting to look pretty grim there at various points. One would hope that with proper sleep and cold meds and orange juice, the flu would be gone quite soon. So, when four/five days later you’re still waking up in a pool of sweat, a deluge of sweat, a gargantuan underground moon lake of SWEAT, it becomes natural to worry a bit. Like I said, there’s also additional aggrivants like paranoia and the so far unmentioned, depression, that complicate the situation and make it a bizarre solitary prison sentence, especially after day three. That we could also be victims of exposure to some bizarre government experiment, or terrorist poisoning might still be on the table but that would be a matter involving some serious national security. Enjoy your health, brethren!

Post Op

January 3rd, 2008

Hi, sorry to be gone for so long.  That writing orgy took a lot out of me but it was very healthy and warrants a description of the experience but perhaps later.  In a nutshell, I felt this intense compulsion to participate in this  writing “contest” to write a huge bulk of stuff and I did it.  Yay!  The fact is though, 50,000 words ain’t a hell-of-a-lot and I did a superfast  calculation of a random novel, Angels and Demons and my mathless approximation came to about 175,000 words so I’m thinking that a couple more month-long binges might be in order.   Did I learn a lot of things?  Hell, yes I did.  I would recommend this task to anyone but maybe not.  It stands to reason that if you keep writing and writing you will likely learn something about yourself.  Also, learning something about yourself requires getting through some major murk.  I was actually convinced by the end that I hadn’t learned anything about myself and that I still can’t think straight about story lines that may exist in some physical place and that every character portrayed was just me.  Me in a dress, me in highschool, me as a nasty villain.  Such is, I believe, a similar way of looking at dream analysis.  I mean, all those characters are likely YOU, but when writing a book, they all have to have unique characteristics, etc.  Also, to write, you have to pay attention on a daily basis and be grounded in REALITY (should always be used in quotes) in order to notice the little ‘isms about life.  So, that right there is a quick synopsis of that experience.  It also explains how horrified I’ve been about doing a blog that I suspected nobody reads because 1. I previously had no idea about blogs WHAT-SO-EVER, and 2.  I currently have no idea about them.   In the recent months though, I have discovered some blogs that are very informative and I realize that finding a good blog can be a great resource to a person individually as they can in some ways, live vicariously through the various links and recommendations found there.  Like, you can find out about all sorts of new bands, hilarious cat pictures, and amazing information of all sorts.  Sorry to talk about what everybody already knows but it’s new to me.  This right here is Wordpress (that’s the program that this blog runs off of ) and it’s totally free to use and that is pretty damn revolutionary, if you ask me.  

Revolution:

This is something that I believe to be a very important concept.  I don’t mean marching down the street with the heads of certain a-holes on a stick… I’m talking about the shift of power over to the people.  Blogs are a perfect expression of that.  I’m learning why in new ways every day… awes!  In addition, I play in a band.  We musicians can now shift the power away from the greedy, corrupt industry that benefits us in NO WAY.  Well, maybe if we were Modest Mouse or something we wouldn’t be so jaded, but what the H?  We’re thebrotheregg and everytime someone buys one of our cds from CD baby, they’re not buying some crap at Sam Goody at the mall.  We also have mp3s, which are amazingly revolutionary.  For example, we have our new album up for FREE on a new profile site http://www.virb.com/thebrotheregg.   Hell, I run this site called “Secede from the

Union” and I feel that if I were to run with that, I’d want to keep a pretty level head about it and would want to offer a voice that can be believed.  Not a voice of change, but a voice contemplating the theology of change.      It’s cool, too, how we can record a song and have it up on-line in seconds.  Neat-o. 

Newfoundland:

Anyhow, I just wanted to put something up here because the last entry was way-back-when.  This site deserves to be more, but I’m not sure what.  It’s not a political blog, per se.    Just something human, maybe.    Anyhow, thanks for reading and PLEASE FEEL FREE TO DROP A LINE of some sort.  Like, if anyone out there knows how to make these things look more kick ass, I’d sure like to know!   We’re on a quest here.  It’s a new year.   On the road to

Newfoundland.

National Novel Writing Month!

September 14th, 2007

National Novel Writing Month!  Well, November is National Novel writing Month and I must say somewhere in the back of my head this idea has been incubating and it’s likely that this challenge must be met with wild dogs and horse tranquilizers!  What: Writing one novel in 30 days, starting promptly November 1st, ending the 30th…. 50,000 words. An effort * shared * by those participating, a community of sorts… folks doing the improbable. The idea is to start AND FINISH a novel and to summarize this challenge, it’s to give a back seat to one’s inner editor that might make such a feat impossible. Our delusions of quality and purpose are TOTALLY(!) standing in the way of unadulterated doing and as this time quickly approaches I believe the challenge is eating me alive and I must do it! A novel must be written. If you haven’t heard of this contest, NaNoWriMo ( http://www.nanowrimo.org/ ) , and you are crazy enough to spend the month of November in full writing immersion, I suggest checking it out now. I just found a used copy of the companion book for the contest, No Plot? No Problem. Seeing as how plot might interfere with the act of getting the words on the paper, so-to-speak, plot will be forced to take a backseat. I think community is very important for such a conquest , so hopefully I can help drag some of my friends into this… They have the motto “…word count is king” I’ve been doing away with the inner editor lately anyway, see the recent Gomads recordings!

The Brass Ring Thing (Part Zero)

August 20th, 2007

Creativity

will be needed to solve global problems.  Long live the creative class.  

?: (why do you keep hitting yourself… 

maybe need to take a vow of poverty…      

      poverty of

the  

soul. …stop hitting yourself)

otherwise you and me and a dog named Ghee will 

quit. 

A thought, a drink,  a thing to think

 about               -or- out loud may-bee you freeto dis-a-gree. 

To locate your own self with latitude and longitudes.

and

This brass ring thing,  it

leaves behind you with a finger of green stuff

where the ring was. 

Meta

August 12th, 2007

my new bass

I’m not really into politics anyway. I suppose if the shit’s going down then the shit’s going down. Is the shit going down? Who the ‘ell knows. I’m glad for those recent postings, sophomoric, as they are, sophomoric, as I am, a solid purge. Perhaps from a cocoon, a butterfly I become, one who’s parents were equal butterfly and dragon. Where is the train headed? It’s making rhythmic train sound along the way, great for a train song, in the blues form. How long does the butterfly live and what does it eat? I’ll have to read up on it, research how to live.. Where doth the train goith for weren’t it a submarine? It weren’t a tank for sure that. Perhaps we shall spend the day seeking a certain cleanliness of our surroundings before peace can even be asked hello.

With windows and roofs and wall barriers privatizing me from you, I peek. Gives off an old-timey musk everywhere does. The best minute of the day is spent giving thanks. Thanks for allowing me.

A Bad Song Stuck in your Head.

July 23rd, 2007

bush

Well, sorry to drudge up this old image… Someone sent it to me recently. I’m sure we’ve all seen it before, no big deal. Maybe, if you haven’t well, here ya go. I’m an idealist at heart, with the tendency to see a macroscopic motif in a small statement or image. Yes, well this could be a viable new American Flag.. With Photoshop and all that I’m sure we could have it printed on something flag-like. Anyhow, I wanted to post it up here and give some finality to a rather directionless series of rants that aimlessly expose the fallibility of the human momentum by summarizing everything in one image, for my own therapy, principally.

I do not lay claim to liberalism or allegiance to the Democratic Party. I am using this Internet as what it should be used for, that we commoners, invisible in our daily movements, could express opinions that matter in that we are not on a payroll and are not calculating careers in media or politics. That we are victims of these things and our viewpoint is balanced in its bias, is the proclamation of this entry. I desire this image to be an epitaph to this directionless frustration, that socially and politically we do not size up to our ideals of freedom and that we are indeed moving backwards as a civilized and thoughtful people. Once again, for my own sense of finality, I desire to sum up this chaotic position with this aging photo of our president. There is a sense that a redefinition of A-list words most holy to our citizenry… Freedom, America, democracy.. have been openly mocked by these fellows. Once I make these statements, I feel they are codified and there is no further need to reiterate them. The assessment has been made, the facts internalized, the human life, the pursuit of happiness moves on…

I would like to point out that it is now July of 2007. I am reading in the news how all sorts of supporters of war, certain policy against terror, and inventors of such half-assed justifications are suddenly claiming loyalty turnabout, after a universe of sensibility has descended on all of us and this small faction of hold-outs have refused every word of it.. until now, that these people are allowed to be public in their change of heart is pathetic in its purest form. And this sort of people call themselves leaders, who’s utter lack of creativity, forethought, and leadership at crucial intervals, can be translated to nothing less than a liability to all of us, the electorate, the citizenry. They want to ‘distance themselves from the president’ before the next election or whateverthefuck. This affliction has not only insanitized politicians, but most of America has eaten this crap up too, only now contributing to this unprecedented disapproval rating many of have read about. It’s perfectly fashionable to have unfavorable viewpoints now.. Less likely of being labeled a terrorist sympathizer. Anyhow, I digress. This is a funeral service. Show some respect for the dead. Dead ideas, beaten to death and having their corpses urinated on. Being an idealist means making thoughtful decisions at every step. Don’t throw empty bud light cans in the redwoods. Turn off the fuckin’ tv. Don’t be such a tool. Don’t hit someone who contradicts your viewpoint. Don’t think so little of yourself.

One of the aspects of freedom that is hardly discussed is that it is free to give away. Anyway, enjoy the image of then governor King George the Fuck telling you what he really thinks of you, and what all the people off camera think of you. Yes, I have a sense of humor and know it was done in good fun when the cameras and lighting were being tested, that perhaps even he has a sense of humor. But, like I said, I’m willing to inflate this to the macroscopic that this ought to be our new flag so at least we aren’t fooling ourselves. Besides, red, white, and blue are bad colors together, maybe the fact that their opposites shows how radically differing viewpoints can coexist within flag defined borders, how these colors merely tolerate each other but don’t mix in any way. Tolerance being the utter lowest form of acceptance one step above lynchin’. Tolerance vs. errr, uh, what word would be used to describe a less cynical embrace of diversity..? I don’t know… not getting paid to figure this stuff out.

I’m no martyr on this matter but the first time I saw George Bush on Tv, talking and realized that he was running for President, there was an audible gasp of horror. If you didn’t feel that same gasp, at roughly that same time, you really ought to rethink yourself. I just got lucky this time, admittedly. Perhaps my upbringing, perhaps I had been bullied enough times in grade school to know the face of pure belligerent evil, is where I earned an advantage. But this man was voted into the highest office of our land not once, but TWICE by some small portion of the population that actually voted. A sad thing for all of us, and for those of us “flip-flopping” on their allegiance to this man only now… take a sad, sad, inward look. This is a disgraceful and soulless act. You’d be better off following him all the way down, to perish in historical credibility together.

Something in Your Teeth

June 15th, 2007

If you’re walking around and you unknowingly have spinach wedged between your teeth, it is your true friends that will make you aware of it.. Your real friends will recognize that the benefits gained by sparing you any potential embarrassment far outweigh the discomfort experienced initiating this awkward conversation about spinach… thanks man.
Well, America has spinach in its teeth right now. I mean, realistically, we have more than that. We have a rich history of brutality, racism, and corruption. I would have a difficult time becoming a drunken flag-waver as a result of this baggage. I’d like to somehow communicate which America I’m flag-waving about, and herein lies a problem. It would be difficult to convey this complex national identity crisis on a bumper sticker. I have to admit that writing in a blog means that Homeland Security will flag this column for it’s potentialities. But I have to say to those officials, we intend no anti-American activity here, just to have the unpleasant conversation that we collectively have spinach in our teeth… Because we’re friends and we care.

The previous posting on this site, something about maybe America can’t actually be saved… I’ve been thinking a bit about that one. I haven’t reread it but I do want to proclaim that some of these initial posts are to be geared toward a certain sort of exorcism. This idea that “venting” is in some way therapeutic I will reject for purposes of exorcising a negative tone from this website. Venting, for the nurturing of this manifesto and it’s attempt at post-cynicism, will be regarded as a misappropriation of creative energy and a symptom of an internal constipation, and by venting I mean belligerent and petty expressions of perceptual weakness, and basic negativity without hint of a redemptive resolution. The question is, how do we use our anger, what do we do with it? If not by gradual frustrated release, how might a conscientious citizen react honorably to such horrible and degrading circumstances that mar our history and national identity? Well, perhaps by celebrating some sort of ‘detachment’ we might obtain some clarity. Now, I am not proposing abandonment and emotional withdrawal because this will be regarded as not particularly healthy for our progression toward religifying freedom and liberty. Healthy detachment is discussed extensively in eastern thinking.. Detachment is about Awareness (with a capital “A”), perhaps it is more about Clarity (with a capital “C”) . One observes a stream of changing moods that confuse subjectivity and objectivity in one’s own mind. One observes drifting and floating perceptions that are both not of the here-and-now, and are additionally preventing what one might discover as Truth with a capital “T” in a state of everyday illumination. Anyhow, as I explore the idea of secession, these ideas appear and I realize that we might become more effective at resisting and rejecting these negative aspects that co-define us if we become more open and express eternal commitment to the core essences housed in the loftiest penthouses of our humanity.

So, by ‘Maybe America can’t be Saved’, maybe I’m saying that in sorrow I sometimes feel that we’re losing the identity war to an American darkness that prospers in it’s persistant envelopment, and we are willfully allowing a shallow idiocy to define who we are as people, and to brutally rewrite our history. But, as not to be guilty of venting, it is for the purposes of awareness that we make this distinction between the multiple Americas and define what is really at stake in this war of identity. It is for us to choose. Some of the states of this union are choosing to ‘apologize’ for the occurrence of human slavery that their states participated in, leading to a civil war. Written here are baby steps who’s origin exists in the recognition of a foul history and their adolescence exists in the acknowledgement of a dark emptiness that has been ignored for far too long, and their full maturation will manifest in a new template of politics and a new resolve for an American identity that can truly lead the world by example.